About
“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all.”
– Emily Dickenson
Building a Family
You’ve dreamed about it – yearned for it – perhaps for a very long time.
You’ve imagined what it would be like to fashion a loving, safe home – and a family.
But bringing your dreams to fruition hasn’t been easy. In fact, the journey has sometimes felt more like a nightmare.
I understand. I’ve been there.
If only you could see a therapist where you could just talk without getting bogged down in explaining every little medical detail of fertility treatment.
I truly get what it feels like to struggle to build your family – because I’ve experienced infertility and fertility treatment myself.
You won’t have to explain all the medical jargon to me. I know it (or, most of it!). I’ve done all the testing. I even know how many of the medications feel.
And I get how infertility is a very weird, complicated type of grief. A lot of people (even therapists) honestly don’t have the experience to understand it.
Just imagine…
What would it be like to have a therapist who understands that you don’t feel like you should be grateful that you miscarried? Because, “That means there was something wrong with that baby, and Mother Nature knows what she’s doing.”
Who’s been where you are. Who knows you wanted THAT baby, and you wanted it to be viable. Of course, you did.
Who also knows that a failed embryo transfer can be just as painful as a miscarriage.
Who realizes that, while medical terminations may be the absolute right decision, they can simultaneously – and in equal measure – be complete torture. And that they’re a real mindfuck.
What would it mean to have someone…
Who sees adoption as a beautiful thing – but not as a copy-and-paste substitute for having a biological child?
And who knows that many people can’t, or don’t want to, “just adopt.” There’s no shame in feeling that way. It’s normal.
Who grasps that it’s also normal to get extremely anxious about parenthood as you languish in infertility treatment for years.
How would it feel to have someone…
Who understands when you worry, “What if treatment doesn’t work?” But knows what to do when your face registers the epiphany “What if it DOES?” If you find yourself growing increasingly ambivalent about parenthood, I’m ready to have that talk.
And who sees that people with unexplained infertility can struggle the most. It’s a little tough to process when you can’t pinpoint a clear reason.
Having someone around who can truly empathize – and who’s dedicated to helping you and only you – can help you keep going through even the toughest moments.
Let me help you stop the never-ending flurry of guilt, shame, what-ifs, regret, grief, and anger, and help you reconnect with yourself.
About Me
My Journey – to You
I always knew I needed a career that involved helping people – any other kind of job felt meaningless to me.
When I was younger, I considered becoming a physician, a nurse, a social worker, a teacher, and a divorce lawyer representing women. I changed my major five times in college.
Then, in my senior year, I got a job working with kids with autism; here, I fell in love with the field of psychology.
I earned my bachelor’s in English at Rutgers University and went immediately into a doctoral program in psychology at La Salle University. It was a complete 180.
Being a therapist satisfies my deeply rooted need to help others and give back to my community.
Hopes Heightened – Then Dashed
For various reasons, when it was time to build our family, we needed to skip right to IVF without trying to conceive naturally. It had better and faster odds of success for us, so we went that route.
I’d never tried to conceive before, but I was only 30, my testing all came back normal, and my husband had had two kids without issue. The reproductive endocrinologists (REs, fertility doctors) were very optimistic for us! Yay, right?
Well.
It didn’t go well.
My first cycle resulted in devastating and shocking failure. We didn’t harvest many eggs, and the quality of those we did get was poor. The cycle failed.
My second cycle was very similar: few eggs, only slightly better quality. They transferred my two best embryos, which resulted in a miscarriage. Again, devastation.
My third best embryo from that cycle made it to blastocyst on day six, so they froze it, but the REs cautioned me against hoping too much for that one to work.
But we persisted.
I transferred that embryo, and it became my daughter.
We might have had another child if it had been easy.
But I couldn’t bear the emotional (and physical, and financial) pain of trying again, so it was out of the question for me.
Focusing on Infertility
I started my career spending a fantastic four years as an Air Force Psychologist. Because I’m a veteran, you’ll see some military paraphernalia around my office.
I then transitioned into college counseling. This might seem like a weird jump to make, but college students and young adults in the military have a lot in common. I still enjoy working with young adults when I get the chance. I’m a huge fan of Gen Z.
Eventually, I started my own practice, and infertility jumped out at me when it came time to pick a specialty.
Throughout my infertility treatments, I really could have used a therapist who understood what I was going through. Infertility had overtaken my entire life and left me feeling utterly lost.
At times, I couldn’t put my anguish into words.
Focusing on You
Now, I focus on helping people like you navigate that difficult journey.
I provide the safe space you need – so you can sort through all the tumultuous and often conflicting emotions and realize the way you should go.
I look forward to sharing your journey with you and helping you create the “world” and family that work for you.
A Forever Home for All
I rescue senior dogs, so I spend a lot of time giving them the best end-of-life a dog could hope for.
My dogs are often around while I’m in session. If we do telehealth, you may see a little head pop up from my lap from time to time. I call our house The Retirement Village.
Sadly, none of my dogs have ever been well enough behaved to become a therapy dog, but that dream lives on.
Renovation of the Physical Home, As Well
A lot of my time goes into renovating my old home. Built in 1904, there’s always a new project to tackle.
I’m an avid reader, love intense workouts, and am an amateur furniture refinisher.
I thrive on constantly taking on a new hobby or learning a new skill. I’m always evolving, never stagnant.
According to everyone, this is my best and most annoying quality.